Adventures of the unfortunate
I usually love doing things first. Being the first in my group of friends to discover a new band, restaurant, club, alcoholic beverage etc, naturally so I can be the first to brag about the experience.
Something I have never done that alot of my friends have done, is meet someone that I only know from cyberland.
I have a friend thats staying with me for awhile. She is pretty, single and on various occasions chats with cute guys she's met online. She showed me some photos of one particular guy "J". Tall, short spikey black hair,cute smile,slim,sexy eyes, in one word...attractive. She laughs out loud alot while chatting with him, he must be charming.
Being as it was the 4th of July last night, we ofcourse wanted to go see the fireworks, so while trying to beautify myself (as if), I hear my friend talkin to someone on her cell. Its J. He wants to meet us there. She casually says "Well we're going to eat somethin real quick at McDonalds (the shame) so just call us a lil later and maybe we'll meet up."
At the above mentioned junk food restaurant, Im carrying my tray of food back to the table my friend is waiting at. Beside her I see a guy staring at her. She looks back and looks at me, her eyes as big as saucers. She introduces him to me and I pretend to casually shake his hand,while I feel a mini heart attack coming on which then turns into a very controlled effort to stop a fit of uncontrolable laughter.
I go back to my previous description of J.
Tall= Hunchback.
Short spikey black hair= Short slimey mousy hair...with dandruff.
Cute smile = Teeth that he apprently borrowed from someone in the middleages.
Slim= Pot belly
Sexy eyes= Small eyes and one of them is lazy.
Attractive= The man needed to go shopping...the list? Soap, shampoo, razors, aftershave, toothpaste, clean clothes, and possibly even a few liters of bleach.
"Aw maybe Im being too vain" I thought, " I shouldnt judge people with the way they look"(or smell), so I searched for hints of the charm I thought he must have. My search lasted for approx. 2 minutes. My conclusion? If my life depended on it , I'd rather sleep with Frankenstein.
What about his photos. How could he look so different? Thats when I formed my second conclusion. "Damn it, I hate, hate, HATE photoshop!"
Thankfully I had a fun time watching the fireworks, unfortunately my friend didnt enjoy them as much, the stalker kinda ruined it for her.
Something I have never done that alot of my friends have done, is meet someone that I only know from cyberland.
I have a friend thats staying with me for awhile. She is pretty, single and on various occasions chats with cute guys she's met online. She showed me some photos of one particular guy "J". Tall, short spikey black hair,cute smile,slim,sexy eyes, in one word...attractive. She laughs out loud alot while chatting with him, he must be charming.
Being as it was the 4th of July last night, we ofcourse wanted to go see the fireworks, so while trying to beautify myself (as if), I hear my friend talkin to someone on her cell. Its J. He wants to meet us there. She casually says "Well we're going to eat somethin real quick at McDonalds (the shame) so just call us a lil later and maybe we'll meet up."
At the above mentioned junk food restaurant, Im carrying my tray of food back to the table my friend is waiting at. Beside her I see a guy staring at her. She looks back and looks at me, her eyes as big as saucers. She introduces him to me and I pretend to casually shake his hand,while I feel a mini heart attack coming on which then turns into a very controlled effort to stop a fit of uncontrolable laughter.
I go back to my previous description of J.
Tall= Hunchback.
Short spikey black hair= Short slimey mousy hair...with dandruff.
Cute smile = Teeth that he apprently borrowed from someone in the middleages.
Slim= Pot belly
Sexy eyes= Small eyes and one of them is lazy.
Attractive= The man needed to go shopping...the list? Soap, shampoo, razors, aftershave, toothpaste, clean clothes, and possibly even a few liters of bleach.
"Aw maybe Im being too vain" I thought, " I shouldnt judge people with the way they look"(or smell), so I searched for hints of the charm I thought he must have. My search lasted for approx. 2 minutes. My conclusion? If my life depended on it , I'd rather sleep with Frankenstein.
What about his photos. How could he look so different? Thats when I formed my second conclusion. "Damn it, I hate, hate, HATE photoshop!"
Thankfully I had a fun time watching the fireworks, unfortunately my friend didnt enjoy them as much, the stalker kinda ruined it for her.
posted by athenianstyle at Tuesday, July 05, 2005
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